For adults, 18+
Kink list: Yes / No / Maybe
Mark each activity yes, maybe or no. Send your partner the link. You will each see only what you both said yes or maybe to.
Loading…
How to use a Yes / No / Maybe list
- Fill it in alone. The point is to answer for yourself, not to guess what a partner wants to hear.
- Yes means you would like to. Maybe means you are curious, or it depends. No means no, and needs no explanation.
- Compare. Send your link, or paste theirs. Only the overlap is displayed.
- Talk. A shared yes still needs a conversation about how, when and what stops it.
Consent in three letters
Three frameworks come up whenever people discuss kink safely, and they are worth knowing by name:
- SSC: safe, sane and consensual. The oldest and simplest. Do not do what is dangerous, do it with a clear head, and only with agreement.
- RACK: risk-aware consensual kink. Nothing is perfectly safe, so know the risks of what you are doing and consent to those.
- PRICK: personal responsibility, informed consensual kink. Adds that each person is responsible for learning what they are agreeing to.
All three rest on the same thing: agreement that is specific, informed, and can be withdrawn at any moment.
Want the bigger picture first? The kink test scores 26 roles in about four minutes.
Questions people ask
What is a Yes / No / Maybe list?
A checklist of activities that each partner marks yes, no or maybe on their own, before comparing. It is the kink community’s standard way to negotiate, because it lets people say what they want without having to say it to someone’s face first.
What will my partner see?
Only the activities you both marked yes or maybe. Anything you marked no stays hidden, and so does a yes that they did not return. That is what makes it safe to answer honestly.
Is the kink list stored anywhere?
No. Your marks stay in your browser tab. If you share your list, it travels inside the link you send, after the # sign, which browsers do not transmit to any server.
What do we do with the results?
Start with what you both said yes to. Treat a shared maybe as “tell me more”, not as a yes. And talk about anything important to you that is not on the list.
How is this different from the kink test?
The test is about roles: whether you lean toward leading, following, giving or receiving. The list is about specific activities. Most couples find it useful to do the test first and the list second.