Cared-for

The Cared-for side of a nurturing dynamic enjoys being looked after by another adult: comfort, reassurance, a little structure, and permission to put the weight down for a while.

Signs you might lean this way

• Being looked after makes you feel safe
• Gentle rules from a partner feel caring, not controlling
• You like to be reassured and fussed over

How the test scores it

Your Cared-for score comes from how much these three statements appeal to you:

• Being looked after and gently guided by a partner
• A partner setting caring rules for me
• Being reassured, fussed over and kept safe

The other side: Caregiver

Cared-for pairs with Caregiver. You enjoy a protective, nurturing role. The two are scored separately, and it is common to score well on both.

Talking about it

Say plainly what makes you feel cared for. Your partner cannot guess, and telling them is part of the dynamic.

Take the kink test to see how Cared-for sits beside the other 25 roles, or browse all roles.